Old maid

i am an old maid.

A good friend of mine asked me today, "it must be a funny feeling to haf ur best friend marrying"? i honestly never thought about it. I am actually very happy for her.

Most of all my close/good friends will be married this year or next :). All my cousins, younger sister, and even my old flatmate. I'm very happy for all of them, but i guess i thought i'd be married by now or close to it. In high school, univ, working, most people thought I'd be the first one to get hitched. i even caught the bouquet once years ago now.

But, I'm an old maid.

I guess we don't know what will happen, i can't regret though. all i can do is keep holding onto the promises that God has given me. Once, i daydreamed of dancing with my partner at my wedding which gave me peace. Maybe there is a purpose to why i'm still unmarried or maybe there is more that i'm yet to do. So, i guess I'll find out in time. It's not right thinking to blame it on me being bad at relationships, but more that I havent found a compatible person and gotten to that stage yet.

All i can do is trust that God holds my future. It is a desire of mine to find a suitable companion and have a family. But if that does not happen, I will be ok.